How many of us learned how to establish a hook up relationship? Where do we learn it from? Home? School? Establishing a firm BBW dating relationship is a course to be taught and learned. Here are some tips and advice that are inevitable if you want to establish and maintain a firm BBW hookup relationship. They can also be applied to friendship and even relationship with your families.
Create a safe environment where you can share and trust without hesitate. Do not interrupt, even if you have to use your hands to stop it. Learn to compete with equality. Do not yell at people and so not threat. When you realize you need to apologize, do it immediately. If you are too angry, stop whatever you are doing. Go to another room and give yourself some space. Take a deep breath and calm down. Remember, your partner is not your enemy.
Separate facts from emotions. During conflicts, what perspective might be triggered? Ask yourself: Is my past having impact on my current perspective? This question is about him or her, or is it about me? What is the real truth? Once you can tell facts from emotions, you can see your partner clearer and solve conflicts smoother.
Connect with every part of yourself. We are all constituted by different instruments. We are more like a combination of several different brains and hearts. What you are thinking? What does your heart say? What does your brain say? What does your body say? How about your intuition? For example, your brain is asking you to leave him, while your heart says you love him. Let these voices communicate, so that you can have a comprehensive and overall answer.
Cultivate sympathy. Practice the ability to comment and observe your partner without any judgment. You might have some opinions but you don’t have to agree with them. When you are sympathetic, you are open and connected and more easily to talk with your partner rationally. When you learn to treat your partner with sympathy, you will have more power to control your reaction, instead of reacting passively with your emotions.
Ask questions. We often make up stories of our own or explain to ourselves about what our partners behaviors mean. For example, he doesn’t want to hug because he doesn’t love me anymore. Stop making assumptions, just ask. We can never make mistake because we ask too many questions. What is equally important is to listen to the answers. Listen to what your partner has to say.
Make time for your relationship. No matter who you are and how busy your work is, you need to cultivate your relationship. Make sure you have time for each other. Like gardening, the more time you spend on cultivating it, the better it will grow.